Control.

So today’s 22star14 update is merely a brainfart—pointless rambling to help soothe my current state of mind. (I’m probably going to edit it later on, since I’m just writing it to get it off my chest during my lunch break.) My next update will be Devil Wears Pantsuit Vol. 2, I promise…

We’ve heard it time and time again: “You can’t tell me what to do; I’m a grown ass man/woman.” My glee club director likes to call it the “G.A.M. Syndrome.” Though those two instances refer to a grown man or woman not wanting to take instruction or direction on account of his/her newfound adulthood, today I want to discuss the mere G.M. Taking the “ass” out gives us a chance to look at this state of being from an objective point of view. The fact of the matter is more often than not they’re right. You can’t tell them what to do, because they are a grown man.

Today, I realized that everyone I come into contact with on a day to day basis now is grown. Including myself. I do not have control over them nor can I tell them what to do or judge their decisions. Why not? Because it is not my concern. At all.

Since Saturday night people have been doing things that I do not like. This isn’t new (lol) people are always doing things that I do not like—thus me deciding to be a loner last year—however, recently, it’s been from a unexpected select few who usually are pretty in sync with how I operate and values I hold in high esteem. Usually. This sucks because it made me realize that since we’re all G.M.’s we’re all responsible for ourselves. So while they’re off doing things that I don’t like (to say the least) and treating me in ways I didn’t know they could/would, I am still only responsible for myself. Not them. I walk alone.

I walk alone. No matter how many people I decide to call friend, companion, family, or lover—at the end of the day its just me and the Supreme, kicking it.

I’m the only one I have control over. So like water on the duck’s back, G.A.M.’s actions will just roll on off so I can keep on trucking towards my 22star14 goals. Stay tuned for my nest post: “Devil Wears Pantsuit Vol. 2: Even though I hate my job…”